He Was Told He'd Be Dead by 40. Then He Lost 200 Pounds. | Raheel Siddiqui

I'm 27 years old, I'm 405 pounds. My father at that time, he was a pharmacist. One Saturday morning he looked at me and was like, "Whoa, you know, like, man, you're, you know, you're gaining a lot of weight. I'm getting very concerned. Let's go to the doctor.

I wanna get some blood work done because I'm, I'm, I'm looking like a wa- walking time bomb." A few days later, went to the doctor's office to get my results. This is probably the craziest part. Doctor walks in, has a folder in his hand, looks at my dad and I, looks down at the folder, flips the pages of results over, closes the folder, throws the folder on the side of the counter, looks dead at my father and I and says, "It doesn't matter what these results say, your son's going to be dead by the time he's 40. We're just wasting our time."

What you're about to watch is a conversation with Rahil Siddiqui. This is one of my favorite conversations I've ever had on this show in the more than five years and almost 400 episodes that we've done. I do this show very selfishly. I get to meet incredible people, and I've met hundreds and hundreds of incredible people that I've shared with you through the different episodes. But every once in a while you come across someone like Rahil, who has just an insane story that he was able to come out of with a positive, energetic, optimistic mentality, just filled with love and kindness, but also energy and power, and it's just h- he's infectious.

And I got chills about seven times throughout this conversation. I think you're absolutely gonna love it. This man was 405 pounds and was told that he maybe had 10 more years to live, tops, and that it wasn't even worth looking at his blood work because he was gonna die, and he changed his life. Dropped 200 pounds and is an absolute monster out there preaching positivity and love and energy and aggression and his Wall Breaker Method. It just hits so hard.

These are the conversations that just make me wanna come back and do this show over and over and over again. I love sharing guests like Rahil Siddiqui with you. So with no further ado, please listen to this episode. Follow Rahil. I have links to his Instagram, to his website.

Whether you're watching on YouTube or listening on the podcast, just scroll down into the description. Connect with him, follow him, share his journey. It's only gonna help spread more positivity in this world. I love you guys for listening to this. Let's get on to Rahil Siddiqui.

Rahil, dude, there are not many people in the world who lose 200 pounds and, and come back at it with energy and the enthusiasm, so willing to, to dive into their story and be so honest and candid. Take us on that path to how we got there. Yeah, man. Rahil Siddiqui, uh, born in Long Island, New York, so you see the Knicks on here, go Knicks. And, uh, I currently live in the DC area and like you said, man, I recently lost 200-plus pounds, and it's been a ride.

It's been a journey, and, uh, uh, I like to call myself The Wall Breaker, 'cause I truly feel like I've been through so many walls in my life that I've had to break and to kinda kick things off here. So man, where do I begin? So I was pretty much, uh, born overweight my entire life, um, you know, since birth, so childhood, elementary school, middle school, high school, college, post college, and I was bullied a lot, okay? I mean, I took an absolute beating. I took the beating of my, of my life, like beating so bad that I was so ashamed to kinda show up to a lot of areas, a lot of events because of the shame, the bullying, the fear and just, you know, that feeling of being worthless, man, being useless.

And that's kinda like when you're broken down so badly to that level. That's kinda where my mindset was at the time. So January 2010, fast-forward, I'm 27 years old, I'm 405 pounds, and my father at that time, he was a healthcare professional, he was a pharmacist. And, you know, one Saturday morning he looked at me and was like, "Whoa, you know, like, man, you're, you know, you're gaining a lot of weight. I'm getting very concerned.

Let's go to the doctor. I wanna take you to the doctor and, you know, I wanna get some blood work done because I wanna see if you're okay." You know, obviously, 'cause I'm, I'm, I'm looking like a wa- walking time bomb at this point. So I said, "Okay, sure." Went and got my blood work done.

A few days later, went to the doctor's office to get my results and, uh, I mean, this is probably like the craziest part. True story too, by the way, man. Seriously, it's kinda crazy when I say it, but either way, fast-forward, go to the doctor's office, doctor walks in, has a folder in his hand, looks at my dad and I, looks down at the folder, flips the pages of results over, closes the folder, throws the folder on the side of the counter, looks dead at my father and I and says, "It doesn't matter what these results say, your son's going to be dead by the time he's 40 anyways. We're just wasting our time." And that was it.

So in that moment, man, like, I'm like, "Okay, well..." You're 27 when you hear this. Oh- 27 ... 27. So yeah, exactly.

So in my mind, first thing, like I tell everybody is, "I'm not giving you a five-star review on Yelp, bro. I'll tell you that right now, Doc." Talk about bedside manner, man. I mean, that was brutal and like... And then my father and the doctor go off to talk for maybe a minute or two, and that was it.

We left. Fastest doctor's visit ever, and the craziest part to this story is I never knew my results, never knew my sugar, my cholesterol, my hemoglobin, nothing. He just looked at me dead in the face and was like, "Dude, this guy's, like, useless. It doesn't matter what I can tell him, he's not gonna do anything with his life. We're just wasting our time."

And that was it, and he never told me anything else after that. So the turning point is when we leave, so my father and I leave the doctor's office, we're going home. About halfway home, my dad looks at me, I look at him, and he's like, "Hey, listen, I need you to pull the car over." I said, "Why? What's going on, Dad?"

He's like, "Listen, just pull the car over. Pull the car over. I need you to pull the car over." And then he had a soft-spoken voice, Ryan, but he really raised his voice, like, "Pull the car over right now." So I said, "Okay, okay."

So we're on the highway, I pull the car over on the shoulder lane, and I said, "Hey, what's going on?" He's like, "Listen-" You know, "I need you to take this seriously. This isn't a game." I said, "Well, you know, what do you mean?" He was like, "Look, I'm running out of time.

I'm not going to be there to see you get married. I'm not going to be there to see you have kids. But you, you still have time. You have to take control of your health. You have to take control of your life, and we are not going home until you promise me.

Promise me you are going to do this. This isn't a game. Promise me." So, you know, I'm a dad now, so I tell people this all the time. It's like, you know, most, most times when, you know, you yell at your son or vice versa, you know, when you're, you're a son and a parent's yelling at you, it's kind of in one ear and out the other.

I was like that pretty much my whole life. But that was the first time in my life where I saw my dad really have, like, tears in his eyes, like watering, and I'm like, "Dad, okay, stop." And, you know, I think a part of the reason why, he was battling a lot of health issues at that time. He had, like, rotator cuff surgery, cataract surgery, but mainly a liver issue, and it was really bothering him, and it was weighing on him a lot. So for whatever reason, in that moment, he was like, "This is the moment, man.

I gotta talk to my youngest son and try to get through to him." So I said, "Okay, Dad, please don't cry. I promise. I promise you I will try my best." We drove off, and I get home, and I'm just looking in the mirror like, "What the hell just happened, dude?

Like, I'm twenty-seven years old. I'm four hundred and five pounds, and now the doctor tells me the next minute I only have thirteen years to live. I have my dad telling me he's not going to be there to see me get married or see me have kids, and, you know, what happened, and where do we go from here?" You know? Honestly, it's just kinda like, "Whoa, what's going on?"

So, so the journey began. So that January 2010, um, I tried, and I failed a lot, and I think this is the one part that I really want the audience to understand is, you know, walls are truly always going to come up in front of you. I tried, and I failed a lot. I joined a local gym. I s- I was like, "Okay, this is cool."

I went three days a week, then that dwindled down to two days a week, and then I just stopped showing up because I quit. I went to the local college. I tried to run laps. I went to the local field. I tried to work out.

I quit, I quit. I kept quitting. But I always had, like, that voice in my head that I made a promise to my dad. So fast-forward May 2010, one of my really good friends, he was like, "Hey, man, a lot of us are joining this, uh, state-of-the-art brand-new gym. Why don't you join, bro?

It'll be fun. Um, you know, I think you'll get a kick out of it. We're all gonna be there together." And you know, people, my friends that know me, man, even though I was four hundred and five pounds and I was twenty-seven years old, I was pretty athletic, man. I played high school ball.

I'd still be busting ass in basketball. I was still good at flag football because, you know, I can honestly say now, now that I'm forty-three, it's, I also feel like youth had a lot to do with that. I was still young. Even though I was heavy, I was still young, so the athleticism that I had was a lot of it was still there. But the weight obviously came a lot faster and a lot more aggressively, you know, towards the mid to late twenties.

Join a gym. "Okay, what else do I have to lose at this point? Everything else I tried, I failed on my own anyway, so what else do I have to lose?" So joined the gym, and then first day I walk in, go figure, what do I see? I see a sign that says Team Weight Loss Class.

That's exactly the name of the class. I'm like, "Okay." It's kinda like that, like that light bulb, like la. And I was like, "Okay, man, this is pretty cool." Like, it's destiny, right?

And it was a class for people just like me, the people wanting to, needed to lose weight, start their journeys, kinda, you know, recalibrate, just get going, man, get that first step. So I joined the class Monday, Wednesday, Friday, one hour a day, three days a week. Really quick backstory, first day of class, I remember there was twenty-some people, and everyone's like, "Welcome class." The trainer said, "Welcome, everybody." And I remember she said, "Okay, everybody, first step, first day, you have to announce your name and announce your weight to the whole entire class."

And I'm like, "Oh, man." I'm like, "Please don't make me do this." And she was like, "Raheel." I was like, "Please." I'm, like, in tears, like, "Please don't make me do this."

And she was like, "Raheel, I promise you, I know what you're feeling. I know what you're going through. Everyone has to do it. But when you get to the other side of this journey, as much as you hate telling, as much as you hate this part now, when you get to the other side of this journey, you're going to love telling this part of, of the journey. I already see it in you."

And I don't know why, man. Like, I don't know what she saw in that moment, but she swore that she saw something inside of that four hundred and five-pound guy that was stuck inside, just like my dad did. So I said, "Okay. My name is Raheel Siddiqui." Went on the scale, four hundred and five pounds.

It was quiet. It was like, oh my God, I was embarrassed, I was crushed, I was humiliated. Got in the car, drove home, cried. Got in bed, cried. Wanted to quit.

I was like, "I'm done. No more." But I got back up, and there was that little voice in my head that said, "Man, but you made a promise to your dad. Like, get up, man. Just get up.

Get up." So I got up, and I faced those demons, and I went back, man. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life. So I went, did class. They had weekly weigh-ins.

End of the first week, uh, went to do my weekly weigh-in. I lost about, I think, like, about four or five pounds at that time. Pretty solid. So I was like, "Okay, um, this is pretty cool." Like, I was like, "What if I just come every single day, including the class the very next week?"

And this is where, honestly, where the switch really started to flip. I was like, "Let me just come every single day, including the team weight loss class. What kind of results would I get?" I went every single day. Week two weigh-in comes in, just like Biggest Loser, like, literally, like, the weigh-in, like, the show.

And it was a different trainer teaching at that time. He looked at me, I looked at him, and I was like, "Dude, you're scaring me. What's going on?" He's like, "Dude, you lost, like, seventeen pounds this week." And dude, honestly, Ryan, for the first time in my life, I just looked, and I'm just kinda like in awe, speechless, because for the first time in my life, I didn't quit.

I didn't run away from that wall. I actually committed. I stuck to something. I made a promise to my father. And even though it was a lot of weight, but just the fact that I made that such of a gigantic win, the win for me was even that more gigantic.

And then the lion just came out of the cage, and I became an absolute monster. From May 2010 to May 2011, I lost my first 150 pounds, and I was rolling. I felt like I was unstoppable. I felt like I was on top of the world, like nobody can touch me, nobody can see me. I was a level above everybody else.

I was a well-oiled machine. But as they say in life, you know, you take one step forward, two steps backwards. So May 2010 I was rolling, to May 2011, sorry, I was rolling. Two months later, July 2011, we go to a family wedding in Connecticut, and I was telling you about my dad's, uh, health issues, liver issues. The night of the reception in Connecticut, in the hotel bed, my father's liver blows out and he dies right in my hands, just like that, right in my hands.

So I'm like, "Wow, okay. Well, this isn't fun." And here's... You wanna talk about walls. So that happens in Connecticut.

We have to go do the funeral in Baltimore, where I originally, uh, lived when I moved from New York. The very next day we go do the funeral. There's about 500 people, big show out. I bend over to pick up his casket. I stand up, and what do I hear?

I hear a pop in my back. What is it? I blow out my L3, L4 herniated disc. I have severe sciatica shooting down my leg, down to my toes. I can't tell a goddamn person because I'm burying my best friend, saying goodbye to him for the very last time, and I didn't tell a soul that day.

I was in excruciating pain. So in my mind, I'm like, "Wow, life really isn't fair. Like, why are you doing this to me, man?" Like, I finally got over the hump. I kept a promise to my dad.

Now my dad is gone, and the very next day, now you're gonna add this monster injury to me. So what happens after that? So the fire that I had in me, it was burned out. I was like, you know, "Where do we go from here?" So, and I will say respectfully, it wasn't totally burned out.

I still had a very little spark, and what I mean by that is I was still training, I was still putting in the work, but not nearly as much as I was at that time, right? The injury was really taking a toll on me. Instead of going seven days a week or six days a week, it was maybe like two, three days a week. Very lethargic, and I had this sciatica. I wasn't trying to fix it, just an absolute mess.

Fast-forward to 2016, I meet my wife. We get married November 2016. So I'm like, "Okay, I'm married. Let's just put everything off to the back burner. It's been five years.

Like, whatever, who cares? I'm happily married. Let's just go enjoy life." One year later, I take a selfie of myself just completely out of shape. I gained more than half of the weight back that I lost.

So I'm like, "What did I do to myself?" So then that's another issue. My wife and I are trying to have kids. We try for two years. What's going on?

We don't know. We go see an infertility specialist. She looks at, right at me, tilts her chair, looks right at me, and she's like, "Raheel, I can't 100% confirm this, but I believe the reason why you guys are having infertility issues is because your sperm motility count is abnormally low, and I believe a big reason is because your weight loss, um, story, your journey, trajectory, whatever, has really kind of messed up your sperm motility. The only solution or chance that you guys of having children is in vitro fertilization, IVF." So in my mind, I'm like, "Another wall."

So forget a wall for me. Now I'm the wall that my wife has to go break, 'cause it's not her fault, this is my fault, I felt like at that time. So on we go. So two years of... And if people don't know about IVF, any of the female audiences or even male audiences, it's an absolute beast, okay?

It's a beast. Brutal. All brutal. It's brutal, man. Like, you know, injections, my wife's taking shots all over her body, bruises, throwing up, taking pills, financially, just the wear, the tear.

Then I remember one day in bed looking at her like, "Dude," like, "I don't know how much more you can take out there." Like, I felt like she was a fighter in the ring, just taking a beating, and she took her two fingers up in the sky, put them right in her stomach. She's like, "I'm having this baby. Nothing is gonna stop me. Quitting is not an option, so don't talk to me about quitting ever again."

And I'm like, "Okay," you know, like, "I got it. Let's do it." So then she stuck with it, and then fast-forward, November 2019, she did it. She broke that wall down. My beautiful son was born, Rayan Raheel Siddiqui, R-A-Y-A-N.

Pretty cool spelling, right? So he's the love of our life, and, uh, she did it, broke that wall down. He is our only child. Um, we did try a few more times after that, couldn't conceive, but he's never gonna be a glass half empty. He's a glass all the way full, so we are more than happy and thrilled that he's here.

And, um, two months later, November 2019 is when he was born, January 2020, paternity leave is over. I go to my work garage. I bend over to tie my shoe. I stand up. What do I hear?

Another pop. Now I blow out my L4, L5, L5, S1, sorry. So L3, L4, now my L5, S1 herniated disc. Screaming in pain, two blown discs. I'm in so much pain.

I'm in my work garage in Arlington, Virginia, Ryan. I couldn't even drive home. I had to lie down and recline my seat and drive home. Because if anybody who knows about sciatica, it's literally just shoots all the way down. If you sit the wrong way, you can't even sit on the toilet, on a seat, anywhere.

Like, you have to kind of angle, like, your buttocks tissue. So I'm like, "What's going on?" And I remember crying to my wife, and she was like, "Listen, man," like, "I've been telling you for a long time to get this problem fixed. I told you when you had your first disc blown. You didn't wanna address it.

You kept running away from that wall. You're not trying to go through it. But you're a dad now, and I can't have my husband and a newborn dad in a freaking wheelchair," 'cause that's where I was heading, man. I couldn't even walk, you know? But I think the one piece to this was what really got me.

She was like, "You know, I know you. I love everything about you, like your drive, your fire, your energy, and you don't ever get that without your training. That comes from your training. You love to train. I know how hard you love to train, and I know the best version of you comes from when you are, are training, when you're at your healthiest, at your apex peak."

And more than anything, she was like, "Even though your dad's gone, you made a promise to him, and that promise never left, and I think you forgot that, man. So let's get this fixed." I said, "Okay." So I saw a back specialist- Your wife said that to you? My wife said that to me.

Yeah. She was like- That's a good partner- Yeah ... man. That's a real good partner. Great partner, man. Yeah.

So she had to kind of remind me about, about that, right? She was like, "But even though your father's gone, your promise isn't gone. Your promise is still there. Like, you made a promise to him, man. Like, let's knock this wall down."

So got... Found a back specialist, got back surgery done. Surgery was a success, um, but even rehab was annoying. Like, I couldn't walk up the stairs, down the stairs, just natural back surgery, right? Like, my wife had to change my bandages, had to put my arm over her.

The rehab process for back, you know, spine surgery like that, it's a lot of walking, honestly. You just gotta keep your body flowing and moving 'cause you don't want any blood clots, so you wanna just keep the body k- keep the mobility going. So six weeks of that, I went to go see my doctor Does a full checkup. And even during rehab, I wanted to quit too, okay? So I'm being dead honest with you.

I, it was painful as hell. I was like, "Dude, I wanna quit. I don't want this anymore. Like, I wanna quit." And she was like, "No chance, man.

Like, get up, get up. Like, you got this far, let's go. I mean, let's go." Like, in my ear, like, "You made a promise, you made a promise." So either way, got past that, and I'll never forget what my doctor said when he did my checkup.

Checked my back, my bandages got taken off, and he was like, "Rahil, I wanna let you know, 100% full clearance, pain-free." Three words: "Let it out." That's what he told me, "Let it out," and boy, did I ever, and ever since then, I became an absolute monster. So I ripped off all that weight that I gained. I ripped off an additional some.

I'm now down 200 pounds. I am in the greatest shape of my life. I did get married. I did have my son. I feel like any wall in your life is meant to be broken, and more than anything, I feel like I have now learned what I try to teach everyone out there.

It's, you know, it doesn't matter where you are in your life. If you feel like you are at rock bottom, I want you to change your mindset to understand this is the most beautiful part of your life. Because when you're at rock bottom, man, the most beautiful piece to this, there's nowhere to go but up. So no matter what you're going through in your life, you're just being tested. It's gonna suck.

It's gonna hurt. It's okay to cry, to struggle, to suffer, to, like Goggins would say, my guy, to grow, you must suffer. Everything I went through, I wouldn't change it for the world. Even losing my dad, I wouldn't change it for the world. I felt like that's part of my story, part of my journey.

I felt like in my heart, he probably had to let himself go for me to become the animal that I became now, and that lion is out of the cage. Every morning I get up and I train two hours a day, every single day. I don't care what the weather is. We just had, like, two feet of snow here in DC two weeks ago. Still got in my car, still cleaned the snow and ice off.

I still made it to the gym. I still get my cardio. I still get my weights in. My son is six years old. I make him run laps around the basement from school.

Do his homework and laps. Don't talk to me until that's done. Then you can talk to me after school, because I'm trying to teach him, you know, to be the best version of yourself, you wanna be the best version of yourself. That starts by your health, your mental health, your physical health. So I want to make sure I'm the best version of myself, and I wanna teach everyone out there, man.

Like, if a guy from Long Island, New York, who literally was facing death, who experienced death, who experienced multiple back injuries, who experienced in vitro fertilization issues, everything I've ever been through, and I'm still standing. I mean, I, I'm still here, and I'm ready to go, and if you don't hear it in my voice, man, I will s- I don't know what else to tell you, man. But I promise you right now, I'm ready to go. There's nothing that can stop me. There's no wall big enough that I'm not gonna go run through.

Every wall in your life is meant to be broken. How did I do? Wow, there's, like, so much there that I wanna dig into. For, since the start of this show, I've, I've said to this audience, you know, your health is a competitive advantage in business. Like, 'cause we talk a lot of business stuff, and I think a lot of times when I get, I get pushback from guys.

You know, so I was, I was overweight in, in middle school. I did grow. I grew about six inches my s- between my freshman and sophomore year of high school and, and lost a lot of it, but I got that terror- you know, getting terrorized as a young kid. Um, and I remember I'd tell my kids, like, uh, fifth grade we would walk from the school to the, to the playground, and there was these three kids that would run circles around me 'cause I was overweight. I wasn't fast.

I was overweight, and I couldn't run. Right. I couldn't move, and they knew that. They knew I couldn't catch them. Right.

So they would literally do this thing where they would circle me while I was walking out to the playground, just terrorizing the shit out of me. I was from the poorest town in our school district. You know, I, I dressed like a poor kid. I was overweight, and they just terrorized me. And, uh, finally, if, I don't know that this is a positive story, although I consider it to be one, um, I finally got, one of the kids came close enough, and I threw a punch at him.

I missed him, hit his throat, uh, not on purpose. I was just so terrified and scared and didn't know what else to do and had never thrown a punch before. Um, and he falls to the ground, and he never bothered me again. And, um, that was a defining moment in my own life because what it said was even though, even though I'm not skinny and fast like these little fuckers over here, you know what I mean? Like, there's still, there's still the ability to have agency.

And, like, what I heard in your story was-- And while you struggle with it, which is okay, that's your journey, right? Your journey is this struggle, you know. But, like, you took agency for your life. You said, "I'm responsible for my life." And, and I, I think so many people, it's almo- it's not that they're unwilling to do it.

It's almost like they're waiting for permission. So my question for you is, like, h- how... So I'm sitting here and maybe I am carrying an extra 30, 40, 50 pounds, and I'm unhappy, and I wish my wife found me sexy- Mm-hmm ... but she doesn't because I'm out of shape, and I let myself go, and that pulls into other parts of my life, and I'm, I'm lazy at work, and I'm lazy with my kids because I'm feeling negative about myself, right? How d- how does someone give themselves permission to beco- to, to y- I love this phrase that you have. You let the lion out.

Mm-hmm. I love that. Mm-hmm. Like, how, how does somebody give themselves permission to let that lion out, to start to get after it? Well, that's a great question.

So let me ask you this. Here's one question that I love asking everybody, and I get this question asked a lot, and maybe my perspective is different, but I think a guy like you might, uh, might love this part. So when people ask this question, what's the most important part of your life? What do you-- W- what's the general answer people, most people would give?Um, ah, geez, I don't know. I'd say probably my relationship with my kids is the most important thing to me So family, right?

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Your family is the most important part of your life. Perfect, right? And the, and, and I love that you said that, so here's where I'm going with this.

So this is what I would love to tell that person out there, like, and, and I've learned this too. It's, to me, when that question came to me, when somebody asked me, "Hey, Rahil, what's the most important part of your life?" You know what my answer was, Ryan? I said, "The most important part of my life was my training and my family." So they're right here, neck and neck.

Shaq and Kobe. You're not winning three without Shaq and Kobe, right? Three rings side by side. And what I mean by that is I don't wanna hear somebody tell me that your family is the most import-portant part of your life if you aren't the best version of you for them. When I get up in the morning and I train two hours a day every single day, when I leave that gym sweaty as hell, drenched, just an absolute monster, now, now my wife gets the best husband, my son gets the best father.

I'm mentally razor-sharp. Physically, I'm just an absolute savage beast in my own mind, in my own opinion. And now, now because I've taken care of myself, I've dedicated that time to myself, my mental health, my physical health, my spiritual health, I am the best version of myself. When I leave that gym every single day, now I am the best version for my family. Every time my wife and I go out, the respect that I get now, man, versus what-- Yeah, you talked about those kids getting bullied.

That was like me. I would walk into a room, "Hey, dude," buffet line, "Oh, hey man, leave the rest for everybody else. You clearly don't need to eat." We're at a Pizza Hut, we order three pizzas, "Hey, man, but that's for you. What about the rest of the group?"

Or, "Hey, man, you're just so fat. Are you ever going to lose the weight?" The respect that I got, because I didn't respect myself. I wasn't respecting myself. I wasn't accountable.

At the end of the day, as much as I hated those bullies, it was on me. They didn't put that food in my mouth. They didn't make those bad decisions. They didn't have the self-pity. They didn't have the self-awareness.

It was all on me. But now I know that when I go out, I love to dress up. I'm from New York City, okay? Fashion kingdom, right? I love to dress up.

I love to look fresh. I love to look fly for my wife. I love to look attractive. You know, I think she still thinks I'm hot, and she tells me I do when I'm ready to go. And then my son, man, my son, the fact that, like, he looks at me, Ryan, he doesn't look at me as Dad.

He looks at me as like the Incredible Hulk, and like he looks at me like a big brother, right? He's a only child. But from school, homework, laughs like we talked about, but now when it's time to throw a football, when it's time to run around, when it's time to play, I'm right there with him. But guess who's not breathing heavy? Guess who's not tired?

Guess who doesn't wanna just get off of the couch and just, "Oh, man, what about tomorrow?" No, Rain. "What about the next day?" "No, Daddy, I'm ready to go right now." I mean, he'll tell you most of the times I'm up before he is, and he's six, okay?

I'm 43. I'm 37 years older than he is, but he knows what his father is. What is his father? His father is the lion that is out of the cage. So to answer your question directly, be the best version of yourself.

It's never too late. Don't tell me your family is the most important part of your life if you don't make yourself the most important part of you. Be the most important version of you first. That's what your family needs, but that's what they deserve. That's my answer.

I, I, I love that an- I couldn't agree with you more. It's... Th- In my darkest moments, which there are plenty and continue to be, like all human beings, um, you know, I have, I have two things that I say to myself. The first is not falling apart can be the win. Like, people, people get, I think, hung up on, like, "Well, I'm not moving forward."

Well, it's like this really messed up thing just happened to you. You don't always ne- always moving forward isn't always the win. Sometimes just not falling apart is, is the victory. So just step one, don't fall apart. And then once you get past that phase, that real nasty phase of whatever's got y- their hooks in you- Mm-hmm ... right?

Now to your point, y- this is my belief. Yeah. We can't be the best version of ourselves if we're working only for ourselves. So we need to be working for something bigger. Mm-hmm.

For some, it's God. For some it's, you know, whatever. For, I think for most of us, particularly men, right? It's our family. It's our s- it's our, our, our need to provide, to be the first one out the door if...

You know, I, I, I say, you know, I, I, I say to my kids all the time, "If someone comes and knocks on my door at 2:00 AM, I may not win, but they're gonna regret that decision." That's right. "Because they're gonna get a 45-year-old Irish Catholic fierce motherfucker who's gonna come flying out of there like a bat out of hell." Right. And like I said, I don't know I'll win or not.

Yeah. But they're not g- It's not gonna be a good day for them. And like- Right. But you're ready, man. You're ready.

That's the difference, man. You're ready and you're built for it, man. That's the difference, right? You have that mindset. So now you're freaking hungover or you're not going to sleep or like, or you're, or you're incred- you're, you're out of shape or you don't, you know, whatever.

But like now that guy comes and knocks on the door, these are the dudes that send their wives to, to check the door at 2:00 AM. Exactly. And that's not being the best version for your family. To your point, like I l- I just... It's like if you hate yourself- Right ... in this moment, do it for your family.

Exactly. Do it, you know, 'cause they need you. Like they need you alive, one- Mm-hmm ... right? To your point. They think you weren't gonna make it past 40.

They need you alive, number one. Number two, they need you to defend them. Right. Number three, they need you to present an example for what it means to be a person. And like you could hate yourself every day, but if you're doing it for them, you're still gonna do the work, you're still gonna show up, you're still gonna get up.

And then what, what I think happens, and this is, this is what I'm interested in from you- Is like, you know, you even said, like you didn't, you didn't love your s- you know, 405 pounds. You didn't l- that, you knew that version wasn't the best ver- right? Like, but you started doing the work, and at some point it, it's like you don't... It's like act as if. Mm.

I don't know. You know Jordan Peterson? You know Jordan Peterson? Yeah, I've heard of him. I've heard of him.

Huge Jordan Peterson fan. His book, 12 Rules For Life, literally changed my life in 2017. Uh, 'cause I was, I wasn't on a good path. I had put on 25, 30 pounds. I, I was not my good self.

You know what I mean? And he's got this philosophy that he talks about where if you want something but you don't believe it yet in your head, step number one is just act as if. You don't have to believe it. Just what would that... You know what I mean?

You wanna be a great basketball player? Don't be you, the basketball player. What would Kobe Bryant do? Mm-hmm. Or what would Jordan do?

Mm-hmm. Or what would your, you know, what would your favorite player do? What... You know what I mean? Like, and, and then you almost, like earn the belief.

So my question for you is like, you know, dude, I, I've never experienced 405 pounds. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know what it's like to live that life. Mm-hmm. But, and I, but I can imagine at 405, you're not loving yourself.

Mm-mm. What, at what point during that journey did you, did that switch flip for you and you started to go from, "I'm just kinda doing this to keep this promise to my dad," to like, "I'm, I'm behind this. Like, this is who I am. Like, I believe this. I'm with this."

Like, what did that, where did that happen for you? Where did that turn over? Yeah, no, I appreciate it. That's a great question. So a couple things to that.

I think my first rule that I love to tell people is always this, right? First up, I truly am the biggest believer in don't worry about results. Just don't worry about results, but focus on the work. I feel like if you have the attitude and the mindset to just show up and put in the work every single day, at some point the results will come. We live in a society today, man, where even right now on my Instagram right now too, I'll get...

I'll s- have some before and afters, and this might sound crazy. I was telling my wife this too. I actually sometimes don't like showing my before and after pictures, man, and here's why. Because they'll see the after pictures now, Ron, and they'll be like, "Well, Rahil, man, like yeah, you look great. Congrats.

I wanna look like this right now." Right? Like, "How do I be like this right now?" They want the instant gratification. So then they'll be like, "Give me some tips."

I'll give them some tips, and then they'll be like, you know, and then they'll get back to me whenever, and I'll be like, "Well, how long did you try XYZ?" And they're like, "Well, I tried it for two weeks. I tried it for four weeks. I tried it for six weeks, and then I quit." And I'm like, "Dude, I've been doing this for 15, 16 years."

I'm like, you know, you can't worry about results. Don't worry about what Rahil did. Don't worry about what XYZ did. Just focus on the work. I'm like, people are so goddamn hung up on diet and exercise plans.

Forget all that. I can go on ChatGPT right now, Ron, and give everybody a fricking diet and exercise plan. The f- here's the fun fact. It's, they work, okay? They all work.

ChatGPT, I guarantee you that'll give, they'll give me diet and exercise plans that will work. The problem is: Are you gonna stick to it? Are you going to commit to it? Second part to that question, and I think you're gonna love this part. During my journey, I was about 30 to 40 pounds down, but man, I was really, I was reeling, okay?

It's hard to ask a guy at 405 pounds like a car in the shed who hasn't been started in about 10 years to go on a treadmill, go to a gym, lift weights, and really start ramping up every single day. The body, the mind, it really starts taking a pounding. I walked into a sauna one day exhausted, mentally, physically exhausted. The quitter mentality did start to creep up a little bit. I saw this guy come in, super jacked out of his mind.

I'm just staring at him kinda like weirdly, and then he's looking at me, I'm looking at him like he thought I wanted to like fight him or something. And I was like, "Hey, man, like, do you mind if I ask you a question?" He's like, "Yeah. What's up, man?" And I was like, "Hey..."

I was like, you know, I was like, "I'm on a kind of a journey right now." And then he actually says, like, "I've been noticing you in here every day, man. Keep up the work." I said, "Thank you." I was like, "But my question to you is, you know, how do I look like a guy like you?

You know, I just wanna be like nice and big and, you know, jacked and kind of have like this physique." 'Cause he had like a, like a Hercules type physique. And then he was like, "Well, let me ask you this." He's like, "Where are you at right now on your journey?" And then I said, I was like, "Well, I'm down about, you know, 40 pounds." And I was like, "I'm trying to get to..."

And I think I even said, "I'm, I'm at like 364, but I need to lose like another 100-plus pounds." And he's like, "Hold on. Stop right there." I was like, "Excuse me?" And he's like, "No, you don't."

I was like, "Oh, I'm sorry. I, I don't follow." He's like, "That's your problem right there." He was like, "Listen, when it comes to this journey or any journey in life," he was like, "pretend like you're building a house. It's brick by brick.

If I hand a construction worker a blueprint to build my house on a Sunday night, do you think Monday morning my house is gonna be ready? No, it's not." So he was like, "What did you say where you're at?" I said, "I think 364." He said, "Starting tomorrow, the only goal that I want you to set for yourself is get to 359.

I don't care what you gotta do. I don't care how long it takes. That is your only goal. Get to 359. And once you get to 359, then your only goal is to get to 349, and then 339, and then 329."

He was like, "Just go brick by brick by brick." And he's like, "I promise you, then you'll, you'll know. You'll see it. You'll feel it. You'll know."

And I'm telling you right now, Ron, even as I'm talking to you right now, that fire that I had burning at that time, it was like, whoa. I mean, he put a lot of gas on it. I needed to hear that because the s- the, the long story short is I was setting these exponentially large goals. I already lost 30 or 40, and I kept saying I gotta lose another 100 and something, and that was a defeating mentality. So for, for the audience out there, you know, if you're saying you wanna go make a million dollars, that's fine.

But why don't you go make just $100 first, or go make $1,000 first, and stop putting pressure to go make a million dollars or, you know, go own a yacht or go own your own business. Start small. If you want to build a house, you can't build it in one night. That is just like the human body. That is the mind, the human mind.

Small stips, small steps, brick by brick. Focus on the work and the results will comeYeah. It's funny, we, we, you know, I, uh, there's this concept of detach from the outcome, right? Very common in sales, sales circles, sales commentary, sales keynotes, you hear people say, "Detach from the outcome. Detach from the outcome."

And what's funny is it's very rarely is that concept applied outside of something like business and particularly sales, where I can think back to what you just said, like, where I didn't necessarily... I, I actually just got rid of my WHOOP, and this is not anything against WHOOP. I think it's a fantastic if you're... It's, this is the, the fitness tracker. Okay.

Fitness tracker. Wall breaker. Yeah, yeah, sorry. Um, an Oura Ring is another version of it. This is the one, WHOOP's the one that goes on your wrist, and I've been wearing it for like six months, and what I found is I became way more, like, captured by what was going on in the app than, like, what I was doing in the gym.

Like, I was, like, tracking each set and da, da, da, da, and I'm like, and then by I get to the end and I'd be like, "I'm not even sweating"- Right ... because I'm spending so much time doing all this crap to, like, track. And finally, I just said, "I know what to do." Like you said, if I show up, I eat reasonably well, I get good sleep, there are a few supplements and shit that I take, you know, for, for being 45 and, you know, I told my doctor, like, I ain't going quietly into the night. Mm-hmm. So we're gonna fight this thing as long as we can, and, uh, aging that is.

And, uh, like, that's it. Like, just do those things, and I, and I literally took... I, I literally was driving and I was so frustrated that I had gotten-- I was so hung up on what the app was telling me, the results- Mm-hmm ... that I wasn't doing the freaking work. Exactly. And it, like, hit me like a ton of bricks.

I'm like, "W-why do you care what the app says? How do you feel?" Like, do you, are you hap- when you're naked in front of a mirror- Mm-hmm ... are you happy? Right. Like, are you, you good about yourself?

Right. Like, is your, is your brain foggy? Can you think? Mm-hmm. And if those things are all there, you're doing the right stuff.

Right. You're, you're on the path. Like, you know the markers. 100%. And, and, and I think sometimes, dude, you know, to what you're saying is we get...

The result becomes another way to avoid doing the work. 100%, without a doubt. You know, you see the- Yeah ... you see the yacht, you see the Bentley, you see the mansion, you see the bank accounts on social media, XYZ, but how do you get there? Again, it's my wall breaker method, man. You wanna get from point A to point B.

Everybody wants point B, but here's the wall. You gotta go break it, bro. You gotta go break it. You're not gonna ever get from point A to point B without breaking the wall. People don't want to break the wall.

That is the problem today, and that's why I tell people, you have to focus on the work. I mean, without the work, you will never get to where you wanna go. You're never going to be able to break that wall. I mean, it truly just comes down to your mindset focus of don't worry about the results. If you truly find that plan, stick to that plan, and focus on the work every single day, the results, I, I, I'm the biggest believer, man, they will come.

It took Michael Jordan seven years to win his first ring, okay? Seven years of taking the beating of his life to win his first ring. He could've easily been like, "Oh, I don't want it no more. I got my money, I got my Hanes, I got my McDonald's, I got my Gatorade." No.

He wanted to be the GOAT, okay? He knew that it... I'm going through the Knicks and the Pacers and the Pistons, and I'm being compared, compared to Bird, Magic, XYZ, whatever the case is, but seven years. And that's why I tell people all this time too, it's, man, I'm, it's painful 'cause I'm a Knicks fan, but, you know, if you look at that picture, the iconic picture of Jordan just holding that trophy, and he's crying his eyes out, that iconic picture, I, I think you know e- what, what I'm talking about. I hope you do.

Yeah, yeah. And his dad is right next to him, and he's crying and crying and crying. In my 20s when I looked at that picture, I'm like, "Yeah, okay, cool. He won the championship." Now as a man, as a father, as a leader, as somebody who's been through the journey on my own, I'm like, man, he cried because he put in all of the work.

He didn't know when the results were going to come. Seven years of the beating of his life to take that wall, take that shoulder, and ram through that wall, and what was waiting for him was that iconic trophy, crying, letting it all out. Tiger Woods went 14 years from Masters number four to Masters number five. 14 years, okay? He went through hell.

Everything he's been through, his personal life, the back injuries, the spine injuries, XYZ. Everything he went through, came back and won his fifth freaking Masters within 14 years. So the bottom line is, dude, it doesn't matter how long it's gonna take. If you are doing the right things and you're putting the work in, it will happen. I just gave you two of the greatest probably athletes of ever of our generation if I'm not mistaken, right?

I mean, I don't know if I could give you two, two better examples than that, you know what I mean? Well, I, one of the things that I love about Jordan's story is that, um, before he won the first championship, they lost to the Pistons twice in a row. And after the first Pistons series, Jordan realized that he wasn't strong enough. Right. That he had to get stronger.

He was getting tossed around. Laimbeer was beating the crap out of him. The weight room. So he goes, uh, he goes- Tim Grover ... with his coach that night, four- Mm-hmm ... right? He gets with Tim Grover, and he starts becoming a badass.

Well, what, what, you know, what you, what you, you hear in The Last Dance, but most people don't know, is that he goes with Tim Grover, and he get, he turns into an absolute monster. 100%. Then he loses to the Pistons again. So now think about what's going on in your head. I just went to war with myself to become the baddest version I could be.

I, I was not strong enough. Now I am, and I still lost, and he comes back again, and that's when he wins the championship. So it's like, it was like even though he did all of it, and this is what I love about your story, right? Like, like God tested you again, right? He said, "Oh, you thought, oh, you got a little comfortable?

You thought you were good? You thought you had this shit figured out? Nope. Here, we're gonna put, we're gonna put this on you again and see if you're really here, and now you, now, now you got it," right? But like, this is, this path is not...

Like, it's a hard lesson to learn, and we all have to learn it. Yeah. And I, you know, I think you hit a certain age, it's just experience, but- Man, like I, I, I, I'll give you an example, dude. So, um, you know, I, uh, I, I had this company, um, built it up. It was my baby.

I sold it. I sold it to the wrong people. I watched them murder it in front of my eyes. Man, I'm sorry. And, uh, eventually, when I had my first exit trigger, I was out, right?

And I just... This was, this was gonna be the next ten, 20 years of my life. I li- everything about this was everything I wanted it to be. And when that happened, it was the first time in my career I had no idea what I was supposed to do. Like, this was my identity.

Like, I was the CEO and founder of this company. Like, this is who I was. It was all my philosophies, all my beliefs, you know, just, just battle tested, put into place, and it was working. And I was like-- And then all of a sudden, it was like, who are you now? Are you, like, gonna be consulting guy?

You gonna be speaker guy, podcast guy? Do you just go find another job? Like, what... And dude, I went all the way back into bad habits, not working out. Uh, I hadn't smoked pot in twenty-five years.

I started smoking pot for some reason because I convinced myself that I had to land the ship at the end of the night. Right. And, and I thought I had mentally beat all this stuff. Like, I thought this was long gone. Mm-hmm.

And it was like as soon as I allowed that crack to open up- Mm-hmm ... it all just came rushing back in. So I guess my question for you is, like, what are you doing on a daily basis? Because that version of you, that four hundred and five-pound version, it's still out there. It's, it's, it's out there. It's circling you every day, right?

Just like all my demons circle me, just like everyone who's listening to this, their demons circle them all day long, every day. How do you keep them at bay when, when they're barking? Uh-huh. You know, I get the good days, it's- Of course ... but when you're having a bad day- Mm-hmm ... how do you keep them at bay when they start barking at you? Yeah.

No, I mean, that's a great question. So you hit it on the head. Even like the, going back to your Jordan, uh, example of he worked out, built his body up, and he still lost to Detroit, and it's kinda like in your mind like, man, what just happened? So relaying it to my story, I lost my dad, who died in my hands, and if that wasn't bad enough, the salt on the wound, the very next day, out of all-- at the day of his funeral, I blow my back out, man. So you're talking about back to back, like two day, literally twenty-four hours apart, back to back.

So you talk about walls and even your story, man, I mean, kudos to you. You're an absolute beast yourself and everything you've been through. Those are nothing but walls that came up in front of you. That's, that's the beauty that I try to tell people. So you mentioned the, you know, it's, it's out there.

You're a hundred percent right. It is out there. Those walls are coming, man. And, and, you know, the thing is it's-- I-- It really comes down to the fact of just the belief of, you know, the belief and the trust of everything you've been through, everything you've experienced, and the version of what you are now. Now you understand the mindset, and this is exactly where I'm gonna go with this.

It's at some point in your life, you have to take that mindset of, you know, for so long I felt like I was the hunted, and now I'm the hunter, right? You guys all were chasing me. You guys were all coming after me. You guys all wanted me. And guess what?

I'm here, and now this time you guys looked at me, I turned around, and now you guys, you guys better run from me. You know? And the kind of like, uh, kind of like the Incredible Hulk story, right? I mean, there's a scene in the first Incredible Hulk. What happened?

Sergeant Ross, I don't know if you're a comic book guy or not, but Sergeant Ross, they wanted what was in Dr. Banner. They wanted the Incredible Hulk. All Bruce Banner wanted to do was be on his own, live his dream life with the love of his life, Dr. Betty Ross.

He didn't want any trouble. He wanted peace. He knew if his anger, temper, blood pressure went up, the Hulk would come out. He wanted to be left alone. So that iconic scene, and, uh, it's funny because that's what I feel like that's exactly this, the point that I'm trying to make.

The soldiers were coming after him. The bad guys were coming after him. Sergeant Ross was coming after him. They cornered Dr. Banner.

They threw gas tanks at him. He saw through the window, uh, the love of his life, Betty, got tackled, and then all of a sudden you see the smoke, but then you see the hand come out, and it goes from white to green, right? And then you just see the shattered glass coming out, and then you see the Hulk coming out, and everyone's like, "Oh my God. What just happened?" When Michael Jordan won his first championship, he-- everyone thought that he, oh, you know, he was becoming the hunted.

No, he wasn't. Now he's the hunter. He got what he wanted. Now all y'all better turn around and run. Run, MF-ers.

Run. Two, three. I took a two-year break. Hakeem, you did your thing. You beat my Knicks.

I forgive you. I met him, so he's the nicest guy ever. Came back and won three more. That was the mentality that he had. So for everyone listening to your question, stop being the hunted.

Be the hunter. I don't care who's coming after you. Make, make yourself so indestructible, like a fucking force of nature, that they better run from you, okay? You either, like what Kobe said, I'll, I'll never forget this quote, "You run with me or you run from me," and that's exactly my mindset. You run with me or you run from me, man.

Four hundred and five pounds is staring me at the face. Four hundred and five pounds is scared of me. I'll tell you that right now. Rahil 2010, he don't want that smoke, and that's for anybody out there. Ryan, whatever year you went through, so sorry for all your bad business.

He don't want that smoke. You're not gonna let him get that smoke. Because why? Because he's running from you, right? You're the hunter now.

That's the mentality I try to tell people. Stop being scared. Don't be scared. You're not the hunted anymore. Be the hunter.

The second you have that Incredible Hulk mentality, nobody is gonna mess with you. And if anything else, they're gonna respect you, 'cause they're gonna be like, "Dude, we don't want no smoke. We respect everything you've been through, what you've gone through, what you have achieved now. We want a piece of that. Talk to us.

Help us. Help us be a wall breaker." How's that answer? Oh, it's boxing day for me. That's what I'm doing.

I'm done here. I'm like jacked out of my mind. I'm so glad it's boxing day. I'm like vibrating over here. Yeah, man.

So I, I got a n- my next question, dude, is, um- So, uh, guys listen to this, and gal, guy, gal- Yeah, yeah ... either way, it doesn't matter. Uh, although I do think guys tend to deal with this more. Yes. Now, gir- l- ladies, I know you got your shit to deal with, too. Yes.

But this particular problem I think does inflict men more than women. And what I found is, so in 2017, um, what, what changed my path was in 2017 I was, uh, MC-ing an event that I had put on, and the closing keynote, um, uh, I passed out before the closing keynote. Oh, man. Mm-hmm. I was out of shape.

I hadn't been taking care of myself. I hadn't been sleeping, been drinking too much, wasn't working, all this stuff, and I was supposed to go out, and my body couldn't keep up, and I passed out before I went on stage to introduce the last speaker. Hardly designer. I promised myself that would never happen again, okay? So I go on this journey.

I, I take on an anti-inflammatory diet. I go, turn into a lunatic about research and shit. I go full, full tilt working out. I drop 25 pounds, and I'm like, you know, "Th- this is, this is the new version of me." Dude, there's a lot of shit that you get from the, from the people in your life when you're making these moves, and I know there's a lot of guys that they're listening to you going, "Ah, I wanna be the hunter."

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. "Let's go." Mm-hmm. But when you decide to be that version of yourself, now your drinking buddies, you're not...

You can't go out drinking with them as much as you used to or ever, right? When they wanna pound 17 beers in a golf round, you, you're gonna play it straight because th- you know that that ain't good for you, right? So now all of a sudden they're going, "Why you, you know, what are you talking about you're researching peptides? Why are you, you know, eating salads and shit? Like, let's go get a burg."

You know what I mean? Yeah. Now they start putting their shit on you. Right. So how does that guy who's trying to change his life, who, who maybe feels alone, maybe feels like the people don't understand what he's trying to do, how does he work through to, to become that hunter?

Yeah. No, that's a great question. I got a very simple answer to that, man. If your friends don't understand or support whatever journey you're on, it's very simple. You got two options.

One, you don't hang out with them, and you stay on your journey. Or two, find new friends. Because if you're a real friend, if you're my real brother, and you're a guy who I've, you've loved me and I love you since whenever, middle school, high school, college, professionalhood, et cetera, you will truly support me, you'll truly appreciate me, and you'll be there for my journey all the way through. You'll understand that certain situations, certain elements in my life, I can't go to, I can't be around because I'm on a journey. I'm focused.

I'm in my lane. So for example, one piece to this story from 2010 to 2011, how I lost my first 150 pounds, Ryan, I didn't go out at all. I sacrificed one full year, okay? I didn't go out on weekends with my friends. I didn't go out to any dinners.

I didn't go out to any restaurants. You know, financially, my dad even supported me as much as he could for whatever I needed. Like, you know, healthy foods, groceries, 'cause that stuff is more expensive, especially at that time. I mean, it always is, but whatever I needed, my mo- my father was all in on my journey. He was so proud, so happy.

He was like, "Whatever you need me to do, I got you." But my boys who I was always hanging out with, who still would love to hang out, even if it's not even, like, anything bad. Even, like, even if it's, like, not, not even, like, alcohol related, like, or even clubbing or partying, just, like, dinner and a movie. Nah, man, I can't do it. I can't, guys.

I can't. I can't go to have pizza with you. I can't go to the movies with you, 'cause I gotta go to gym class in the morning. I'm leaving to gym class at night. I gotta go in the morning.

I'm on a journey. I'm trying to be a better person. I'm trying to be a better man. And if you guys really care about me, you'll understand, and they did. And now there were some, and you know, you know, man to man, you're gonna get like, "Oh, man, stop being a B," or, "Stop being this," or, "Stop being that."

Those people, man, you know, all right, man, do you, you know? I mean, if that's what you think, that's on you. I really don't give a shit what you think about me. I am laser hyperfocused. I gotta do what I c- I gotta do.

So I think the best way I can kind of really summarize my answer is you have to understand and ask yourself as a man, 'cause we talked about this being, uh, strictly on the men's side of the house, it's what's important to you, man? Like, what is important to you? Is it important to go hang out with your boys and spend time with them? In this scenario where you are on a journey, specifically on a journey, and you know you need to reach certain goals, certain dreams, you're trying to get to the other side of the wall, right? Is it important for you to kinda, oh, throw them a bone and be like, "Oh, you know what?

It's only one day. It's only two days. It's only a weekend trip. It's only a golf outing. It's only a, a AC trip, Vegas trip," whatever.

Or, you know, do you, do you understand, like, what you're trying to accomplish? I mean, I'm trying to win a championship. I'm trying to be heavyweight champion of the world. Heavyweight champion of the world, okay? I don't wanna just go in the ring and, and you know, I think it's, it's funny.

I think of Rocky a lot, too. Rocky I, all he cared about was going the distance, right? And he did. He went the distance. But Rocky II, it went from going the distance to, "Well, I already did that.

What's next? I wanna win." Adrian got out of that coma, and she said, "There's something I want you to do for me." And he's like, "What's that?" She's like, "Win."

And the second she said that, the second she said that, all he saw was winning. So that's the bottom line is what's important to you. What's important to me? I wanna win, and if you're not gonna w- if you don't wanna win with me, then get the fuck out. I'm sorry if I can't curse or not, but I try not to, but, uh, I'm just being honest with you.

Get out. It's good. Get out, because I'm here to win. I want to win. I wanna be heavyweight champion of the world.

I don't wanna just win one championship. I wanna be like Kobe and Jordan, five and six, and Kareem, and whoever else. I don't... Derek Jeter, five rings. I wanna be the greatest.

I wanna be the best. I wanna be number one. I just told you, my family is not the most important part of my life. If I can't give that to them, I have to be the most important version of me. How?

I gotta be a winner. I need to go win. Win at all costs. Break that wall down and go fucking win. That's how you determine what is the most important to you, how you decide who you hang out with, how you live your life, how you go about your business.

Bro. Fuck. So- You like me as a guest. I'm, I'm assuming you still like me as a guest. No.

I'm, uh... You've given me chills like seven times. I appreciate it. Sometimes I've been like, I can p- I can picture, I- that scene, Rocky II, whatever. Uh- Yeah ... the other one I love is Rocky V when he's like, you know, "It's not, it's not how, it's not about how hard you can get hit, it's ab- or how hard you can hit, it's about hard how hard you can get hit."

Keep moving forward. Rocky VI. Like I have made that scene for my children- Yep ... over and over- Oh, yeah ... and over again. Yeah. Because I tell 'em all the time like, like, like right now, 'cause where they're at in sports- Mm-hmm ... um, you know, they're, they're 10 and 12.

Yeah. So the kids are all different sizes. Yeah. There's kids that look like adults- Mm-hmm ... at 12 years old. Yeah.

And I tell 'em, "Dude, it's not about now. This is not when winning is done. Winning is not done at 12. Like become... Go, go set the p- s- Become who you're gonna be at 18, at 20, at 25 right now."

Yeah. "This is where you set the... That guy right there, he's not learning any hard lessons." 100%. He, he's, he's a- twice your size.

He's, he's a foot taller than you. Mm-hmm. Of course, he's better than you at basketball- Yeah ... at 12. Right. Go freaking become the guy."

Like, like keep... Like that's, that's, that's a big part of where my just don't fall apart came from. Yeah. What I take from that is like, it's the getting back up that's the winner. Yeah.

100%. Right? It drives me nuts when I see little kids on a field, 'cause I, I coach and stuff. And today these kids will like fall and get like a booboo. Yeah.

Like I have no better way to describe it than a booboo. Yep. And now it's, "Oh!" And like the parent comes out, and the mom comes running out. Yeah.

I would have lost my mind on my mother if she had run out of the stands 'cause I was on the ground hurt. 100%. Like, get away from me. Yep. These kids are screaming for mommy.

Yep. And I'm like... I look at my kids and I'm like, "Look, I know that shit hurt." Mm-hmm. I know it hurt.

Yep. You got two choices. Yep. It can hurt on the bench- Yep ... or it can hurt on the field. Yeah.

Where do you want it to hurt? Yeah. 'Cause it's gonna hurt either way. 100%. And like, I feel like, like we just would so much rather... So, so many of us today, men in particular, have been indoctrinated to be, "Well, let me just be hurt on the bench, and then I can play the victim card- Mm.

"... and then I don't have to win." Yep. "'Cause I'm gonna get all the attention I want being the victim on the bench with the booboo." Right. "But, and no one's gonna expect me to win, so I don't have to actually do that."

Right. And that's why I think there's so much mental health issues, so many people dealing with all this confidence shit. Like men aren't getting married. Dude, I read some stat that some, the, the majority of men under the age of 24 or 25 have not had sex in a year. Yeah.

The majority. I believe it. What? Yeah. That's crazy.

I know. I mean- I'm telling you ... I don't know if you remember 24 or 25. Boy, I was trying. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. No, man, I'm telling you. Back then. I know.

It's, it's crazy. Yeah. It's crazy the world we live in. Yeah. So, all right, I wanna wrap this up.

I'm gonna change direction wholeheartedly. Yeah. Go for it. We can, we can, we land this ship in a, in a nice way, although I'm sure you'll get me jacked up- Got you ... but, um- Dude, I can't wait to hang and lead live. Oh, yeah.

That's gonna be fun as hell. Oh, we're gonna light it up. Um- No doubt. No doubt. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Um, uh, so y- speaking. Yes. Right?

Talk to me about... So, so you have all, dude, this incredible energy, incredible story. Now you're bringing it to the stage. Yes. Talk to me a little bit about like why speaking as a medium for conveying this message and, and what you're trying to get the audience to do, 'cause...

And I'll just la- level set this last piece. There are a lot of people that listen to this show who book speakers, and I want more people to hear this story. And we talked about after- Yes ... the show, I'm gonna help you get on some stages 'cause I do- Thanks a lot ... fucking love what you're doing. Thank you so much. But like, um, but talk to me a little bit about why speaking, what it is, and, and kind of how this is becoming a medium for you to deliver this message.

Yeah, no, thank you so much for that. I appreciate it. And thank you for everything, man. I'm so glad to, you know, meet you first off, and I can't wait for next month also. Wanted to throw that out there really quick.

But why speaking? It's honest. You know, it's because, you know, the guy that I was January 2010, 405 pounds, he needed the guy, he needed a guy, someone to look up to. He didn't have that guy. The guy that I am now, that's the guy that that guy needed.

So anybody out there, if you're struggling, if you're suffering, if you're crying, if you're bleeding, and if you're taking your shoulder and you're ramming it against that wall, and you're ramming it against that wall, and you're ramming it against that wall and it's not breaking, and you wanna quit, and you wanna fold, and you feel like, "Oh my God, it's never going to happen," I promise you it can happen. It will happen. Talk to me. I promise you, you are looking at a guy who felt the exact same way that you are feeling right now. It truly just comes down to, you know, what is, going back to the last question, what is important to you?

If it's important to you, whatever goal, whatever dream, whatever achievement, whatever greatness that you're trying to achieve, it's on the other side of that wall. It truly is. It just comes down, it stems from the fact of, you know, what are you willing to do? What are you willing to sacrifice? What type of work are you willing to put in?

Because if you run away from that wall, you have no idea what you're missing out on. You are cheating not only yourself, you're cheating, could be cheating your colleagues, you could be cheating professionals in your network, your friends, but most importantly, especially your family, right? You're, you're cheating them because they're not getting the best version of you. The, the most important people that deserve the best version of you are you, first and foremost, and your family right next to you. You have to believe that you can do it, man.

I was 405 pounds. I was 27 years old. My doctor told me I was going to be dead by the time I was 40. To have my father pull me to the side of the road and make me promise him to take control of my health and my life because he was running out of time, I mean, that promise still lives inside of me. And yes, he died in my hands not even 18 months later.

He died, but as my wife reminded me, my promise never died, and it never will. So going back to kind of wrap up the question, it's you can be a wall breaker, I promise you. Is it hard? Is it tough? Is it probably the toughest thing you're going to have to do in your life?

Yes, it probably is. I'll even double down and say it probably will be the toughest thing you are going to have to do, whatever that wall is, financials, relationship, weight loss, business, whatever it is. But when you get to that other side, it is the most magical feeling ever. You can be Jordan holding that trophy. You can be Tiger Woods coming back 14 years later, winning that fifth Masters.

You can be Kobe Bryant, rest in peace, my guy, winning three championships, and it wasn't enough. All he heard was, "Kobe can't win without Shaq. Kobe can't win without Shaq." It, it ate him. It, it, it bit his soul, but that was the wall he had to go break.

Finally, when he won that fourth championship, just him holding his wife and his kids and crying and letting it all out, it's like it was all worth it, all the beatings and all the court cases and everything he went through, and then he went on to win his fifth championship. So it's worth it. It's just right now you don't see it now, and to kind of, you know, put a cap on it, wherever your rock bottom is, it is the best time of your life. I promise you it is the most beautiful time because like I always say, rock bottom is the most beautiful place to be because there's nowhere to go but up. Friend, where can people follow along with your journey?

Where's the best place for them to go? Yeah, sure. No, man, thank you so much. So my Instagram handle, @raheelthespeaker, uh, you can follow me there. And my newly launched website is kicking off, uh, any day now, raheelspeaks.com.

So, so fired up. You can find all my information on there. Please book me to speak. I would love to come out to your organization. Uh, this is a drive, a passion, a fire of mine.

I really wanna help people. I really want them to understand that walls in your life are truly meant to be broken, and I really hope you give me the opportunity as I am so blessed and so thankful and so grateful that my brother, Ryan Hanley, gave me the opportunity to come speak on his show, and I'm so proud of you and all of your accomplishments and your achievements, and nothing but the best wishes for you, your family, and it's an honor to meet you and be with you, and I can't wait to do this in person with you also next month. Appreciate the hell out of you, my friend. Thank you. We're out of here.

Peace!